Crisis and Trust

Recently, a colleague reached out to our network of coaches.  She was seeking thoughts from those who have worked with people in crisis.  It got me thinking. 

At some point or another, we humans all face crisis.  

Personally, when working with clients who are met with tragedy-  someone with a child facing addiction, a young mother with a terminal diagnosis, a dying child, the loss of a loved one or a profound betrayal- those clients where a coaching conversation with your typical action steps just doesn’t  make sense in the moment and those clients who have stories that bring you to your knees- I ask them to explore their highest belief systems.

Because at times like these, there are no answers on the surface.

What are we doing here on this planet?  Why do we exist?  What does it all mean?  What else is there?  We explore the blessings and the costs of their belief systems in relation to their situation. We try on other perspective possibilities and we research books that might expand their current level of thinking and give meaning to their life’s journey at that moment. I ask them to stretch, get out of their heads and their pain for an hour, and seek out what their deepest wisdom might be saying.  Right then.  In that moment.

We explore the spiritual beliefs and any religious beliefs they currently hold. We discuss and explore the concept of trusting life and what that might mean to them and their purpose in the world. We share stories either from those we've read or of those we know that illustrate this level of expanded thinking and ask them how they view that story in their own minds—and how they might use the wisdom of such a story to help them cope with what they may be facing themselves.

Some books we’ve explored (depending on what a client may be facing) have been Conversations with God (Neale Donald Walsh), Many Lives, Many Masters (Dr. Brian Weiss), Proof of Heaven (Eban Alexander), Dying to be Me (Anita Moorjani), Man’s Search for Meaning (Victor Frankl), The Choice (Edith Eva Eger),  Sparkle on the Water (Suzan Woods), Sacred Contracts (Caroline Myss), The Power of Now & A New Earth (Eckhart Tolle) and so so many others.  Often, these books are not indicative of a client's exact situation but at the same time, story gives us new perspective on the deepest truths of life itself.  As we expand our own thinking, through such an opening we are able to consider the highest levels of perspective for our own lives, too.

How might we honor our humanity?  How can we be “in it”-  the horror, the pain, the suffering, the fear, the angst, the utter despair- all that we're here on this planet to experience- and yet be “above it” at the same time?  What do we need to arrive just a little bit closer to acceptance of what is in any given moment, and to a knowing that there is still grace right here, right now? 

To honor and allow all the feelings that come along with being human while trusting there’s more to the story that the limits of the human brain just isn’t capable of understanding. To find solace and peace in the not knowing all the answers.

At the profoundest depths of life, when there is seemingly no hope, how do we saturate ourselves with grace? Surrounding ourselves with the highest resources to just randomly open to a page of needed wisdom or have running on audio in the car, and at bedtime.  Limiting the news and politics and that which we have no control (at least until we’ve reached higher ground).  Making strong decisions as to what and who we are plugging our energy into.  Because when you’re in despair yourself or doing massively critical work in the world with other souls in despair, there’s only so much one human can hold.  It’s OK to let a lot go.

Trust begs us to ask, what is that tiniest filament of peace that goes whizzing by our awareness, just barely audible, that says “somehow, even this is OK”? How can we grab onto that and even expand it, letting it hold us in the darkness?

As my mom was actively dying and on hospice (far younger than we would have chosen), in accessing this level of thinking, there was a little room for acceptance of what was, and even excitement for her for what was to come.  The perspective that perhaps death is not just “bad” after all was talked about and embraced.  And yes, all the human grief, the pain and despair of loss, too- lots and lots and lots of that- yet peace and dare I say, even beauty, at the very same time.

I honestly think this is what we’re all longing for.  To experience all that it means to be human while remembering there’s much we’re not privy to in this limited awareness and sinking into the sacredness of what we can gain from engaging the idea of being just a little more comfortable in the waves of the unknown.

Trusting life.  Trusting what's beyond life. Trusting in something much larger than ourselves. Trusting our own inner knowing.  Trusting that each life has purpose, regardless of it's length. 

Trusting yourself.  Trust. 

Not easy for any human, most especially in the midst of crisis, but what else do we truly have but that?

How might you apply the concept of trust in your own life?

You really are that powerful.